I was very relunctant to attend Fellowship Night yesterday cos I overslept & I thought it was already late. But guess what? My mom asked me to go anyhow... Really thank God for my lovely mother =)
I'm so thankful that I did not miss the screening of the video, couldn't remember the title of the video. But it was a testimony from a newly wed couple in HK/S'pore - Ralph Lim & Alice Lui.
They discover Ralph had a cancer 1 week after they're married.
Then Ralph have to go thru some painful Chemotherapy sessions but yet proved to be no avail.
His tumor in the head was destroying his handsome face in 3 months time... It was such a heart-breaking scene even for people like me - who does not know him to look at. What is more for the family? & especially the wife?
But despite of the pain & suffering they have to go through, they see God behind everything that had happened.
Was very moved by what Alice shared, she said everytime when she look at the husband face (that was already swollen & look nothing like him anymore), she saw the love of God...
I am truly and deeply touched by their faith in God, and their love for each other.
Then I asked myself, what would I do if this thing happen on me or my love one?
I have no answer, and I fear for my answer...
Really don't know how to pen it down properly, am pretty disturbed, as the sharing truly cut to my heart...
I felt so small compared to their faith in Christ.
So ashame of myself, for always taking things for granted.
And I thank God for keeping me from those trials beyond what I can bear.
I wanted to learn to be more grateful, for all that I have & how God had been good to me.
And I want to love God more...
Someone also share this quote to me today - "Keep looking towards the sunshine and you will not see the shadow".
Very true. I guess this is how Ralph & Alice find their strength in God, by keeping thier eyes on Jesus, not on the problems that overshadow them.
But how many times we of little faith lose focus and therefore start to sink deep into our troubles, and got blinded by the darkness around us?
We often forget God is always there - today, yesterday & forever, we only need to turn our eyes upon Him.
Perhaps all these will not be a problem, if only we know God more... if only we love God more... ...
And as I was watching the video, I can't help but missing him, greatly...
Many a times, I was wondering, what would it be, if you are still around?
Many a times, I would still try to look around, trying to search for your warm smiling face.
Many a times, I have lots of things in my heart that I wanted to share it with you.
Many a times, I wanted to tell you of the silly things that I have done, or to share some jokes with you.
I really miss you, alot alot...
I'm still very selfish huh? =p
Always wanted you to stay here & keep toiling, rather than let you peacefully back to the Father and resting in Him.
Will you be dissapointed with me when you looking down from up there?
I am, I am very disappointed with myself.
I think I have let you down, I think I have let God down.
As I look back how I live my life, I must have grieve many who loves me...
I'm so sorry...
God, help me...
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